Wait For What - An Ode to Patience

by Steph Sparks

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Double the time it's supposed to take? Triple the time? Five minutes after you’ve been waiting? And at what point do you finally just say f*ck it and move on to something else?

Corporations have secured bags on bags on bags creating products and services that make sure we don’t have to wait any longer than necessary.

Because we are physically, mentally, emotionally allergic to patience. We want instant gratification, instant success -  we want sh*t when we want it. And if we might have to wait longer than expected, somebody’s head might have to roll.

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Even our goals. We throw in the towel before the first drop of sweat falls because we think it’s gonna take too long (which is bullsh*t, because the same amount of time is going to pass regardless).

Or we give up because we let our ego convince us that we aren’t… whatever enough, and never will be. Detouring off the journey before we even get started because our ego told us the destination is full of our biggest fears.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep,. But I have promises to keep,. And miles to go before I sleep.png

Off-topic-but-on-topic - if you’re reading this from here on Earth you’ve more than likely seen an inchworm move, so here’s an analogy.

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The inch worm doesn’t stop after each inch forward, turn around to check and see if the rest of its body caught up yet. It keeps the f*ck going, knowing that with every inch forward the rest of it is also in motion, and it’ll eventually end up in a new place.

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Religious folk would call that faith, some like to call it a knowing.

We have to know enough to be patient with ourselves, to be patient with our effort and knowing that we’re always doing the best we can. Or at least, we should be.

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It takes a while to even get to the point where you believe your goals are actually possible, which can be the hardest part. Because if the belief isn’t there you’re pretty much screwed before you leave the gate.

But when you really know yourself, and you know what you want, you can call the ego on its ever-present bullsh*t.

It’s the ego feeding us that sense of urgency despite the fact that we know certain things, most things, take time.

The ego is what puts the notion of not being *blank* enough in our heads.

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These effects are usually what triggers procrastination, doubt and denial in ourselves and our goals. It’s these same effects that keep us locked in a cycle of bad habits that are likely a large part of what’s preventing us from living the life we dream about.

So, the same way a parent is patient with a child trying to walk, we have to be patient with ourselves.

Parents don’t give up on their babies the first couple times they fall, they patiently stick with them til their asses are up and running. No questions..png
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And when you’re trying to heal from a relationship with an overbearing ego, an ego that likes to regularly disguise itself as virtue and intuition, patience can be your best friend and ally.

Patience because you know where you've been, and where you're going, and know that nothing comes easy. Chill out and just let sh*t cook for a second before you go checking on it.

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Give yourself a chance to catch up to your consistent efforts.

Recognize the ego bullsh*t and patiently remind yourself that your only job is to inch forward and know that everything else is moving right along behind you.

And inch at your own pace, not the pace your ego wants and damn sure not someone else’s.

Steph Sparks, 5LTH & Fortune

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